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May 2011

How to Build a Better Bottom

By Penny Hoff

The hardest body part to reshape is the gluteus maximus, the junk in the trunk, the caboose, patootie, booty, arse, badonkadonk — whatever you want to call it. The world of behinds is divided into three distinct categories.

The first group has not enough butt, sometimes known as flat butts, also referred to as party platter butts. These are the people you see on America’s Funniest Videos in the pants-falling-down category .

A little known side benefit of having some junk in your trunk is that it keeps your pants from falling down. Paula Dean is an excellent example. She is by no definition thin, but(t) her butt could be a serving tray and when she wears spanks she has been known to lose her pants.

The second group has too much butt and this is where the majority of adult women end up. They never lose their drawers. Ever. Instead, their struggle is to get their pants ON.

The third group has never looked back there and has no opinion whatsoever about their own tush. Many men are grouped here. If you fall into this category you can skip the rest of this article and go sit on yours.

Unlike belly fat, which, if you have the bad kind, can be lethal, fanny bulge is just annoying and unhealthy in a more vague and overall unhealthy way. This is due to the anatomical fact that no vital organs are stored in our hiney, although I have known some men who’ve made me wonder if this is true for all humans.

If you don’t like what you’ve got back there, here’s what you can do:

If Your Rump Is Flat:

• Lunges and squats with heavy weights can give the appearance of lift and separation if you have good form. Lift a challengingly heavy weight for your size and work through your heels. By that, I mean keep your weight out of your toes, because you don’t want to work the front of your leg.

• Remember the Jane Fonda bridge? Lie on your back, feet under knees and pulse the hips up like 10,000 times. This will directly work the glutes. Add weights and let them rest on your your pelvis as you lift or alternate legs for added challenge.

• Do stair climbing, either on a machine or preferably on real stairs. The major mover in your body when you climb is the glutes.

• If you really yearn for a bubble butt and don’t want to work for it (and it is hard work) you can purchase a handy little undergarment called Bubbles Bodywear. which adds some silicone to it’s padded panty. Bubbles Bodywear are the Ebony to Spank’s Ivory. Uniquely similar in opposite, yet equally important ways. It may sound ridiculous but if those of us with a tummy bulge can spend $40 on Spanks then $30 for a bubble butt sounds like a reasonable investment to those who’d rather have something on their party platter.

If Your Rump Is Too Big:

• Do tons of cardio, preferably running or if not running, jogging. Nothing will more effectively reduce your rear-end size like high-impact cardio. Don’t bike a ton of biking or do heavy-weighted squats/lunges. If you do indoor cycling classes, keep your toes angled up and your heels in a dropped position.

• Do LSD workouts. This stands for Long, Slow Distance. Try for a 60 minute walk, vigorous golfing or tennis. Any length of time over 45 minutes will be burning fat stores and if your fat is in your behind then 30 minute workouts aren’t gonna cut it.

• There is no such thing as spot reduction. You just have to lose weight. The densest weight stores are around the hips so if you drop the extra pounds, chances are it will go from your trunk.

• If all else fails, wear black.

And finally, if you can’t be with the butt you love, Honey, love the butt you’re with.

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    Sep 2009

    Exercise is an Affordable, Accessible, and Effective Preventive Tool

    A message brought to you by IHRSA,  International Health, Racquet and Sportsclub Association…

    IHRSA banner


    The Baltimore Sun posted an article today describing exercise as an affordable, accessible, and effective preventive tool in combating chronic disease.

    “In the 19th century, most work involved physical activity; in the 20th century, exercise became a leisure pursuit; today, it’s an urgent medical necessity.

    Exercise: It’s cheap, readily available, and the single most effective step nonsmokers can take to avoid chronic and potentially fatal diseases. If it were being hawked on late-night television, you’d think the phone lines would be tied up for hours.

    But regular physical activity remains a hard sell. Despite mounting evidence that it lowers the risk for obesity, heart disease, diabetes, depression, and many forms of cancer, the average citizen is increasingly sedentary. Still, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) isn’t giving up on us.”

    In October, the HHS issued the first-ever national Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans. They describe the types and amounts of physical activity that offer substantial health benefits to Americans. IHRSA is a committed supporter of the Guidelines. Members have access to an extensive download library of resources to assist them in using the Guidelines in their facilities and local community to promote safe and effective physical activity.

    IHRSA joe

    Joe Moore
    President & CEO

    This message brought to you by IHRSA and CYBEX
    in the interest of reaching 120 million members by the year 2010.

    Here are some links to the IHRSA web site I hope you will find helpful:

    • Meetings & Trade Shows – Sign up for the September 10th webinar on youth performance training and learn how you can capitalize on a multi-billion dollar market. IHRSA members pay only $49 for this informative and interactive online session.
    • Legal & Legislative –  Contribute to the Industry Defense Fund and become a member of the Public Policy Council. Protect the industry and gain valuable membership benefits.
    • Resource Center – A comprehensive collection of resources addressing all types of issues, from retention and marketing, to HR and personal training. Plus, learn about money-saving programs.
    • International Center – Learn about IHRSA’s role in the global fitness industry. Translated materials available in six languages.
    • Club Business International Magazine – Access archived and digital versions of CBI, the world’s leading magazine for the health and fitness industry, read by nearly 24,000 fitness professionals in 74 countries around the world.
    • – The premier career resource for fitness professionals and employers.
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      Feb 2009

      Weekly Fitness Tip: Healthy Habits for Wellness and Prevention

      A Series of Healthy Habits to Live By
      as scene on
      | watch upcoming weeks postings,  healthy habits 2-13 will be revealed

      1st of 13 Healthy Habits: EAT BREAKFAST Every Morning

      Breakfast eaters are champions of good health. Research shows people who have a morning meal tend to take in more vitamins and minerals and less fat and cholesterol. The result is often a leaner body, lower cholesterol count and less chance of overeating.

      “That one act [of eating breakfast] seems to make a difference in people’s overall weight,” says Melinda Johnson, RD, a spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association (ADA). She says breakfast can hold off hunger pangs until lunchtime and make high-calorie vending machine options less enticing.

      For kids, breakfast appears to enhance alertness, attention and performance on standardized achievement tests, the ADA reports.

      To get the full benefits of breakfast, the Mayo Clinic recommends a meal with carbohydrates, protein and a small amount of fat. Its experts say that because no single food gives you all the nutrients you need, eating a variety of foods is essential to good health.

      Fitness Solutions:

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